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A fascinating and thought provoking post. I’ve only begun exploring this blog, but I’m finding it full of insightful and provocative material. I’m transitioning, MtF, after trying to hold my ground for a couple of years as genderqueer. When I realized I hated the thought of people talking about me using male pronouns, I realized I needed to live as a woman in order to feel free to be myself, which may in fact be something other than male or female. I’m pleased to see your discussions of the complications of gendered languages. A native English speaker, I am fluent in Catalan to the point of being able to think and dream in that gendered language (and Spanish, as a by-product of living in Barcelona). I have had great difficulty explaining to my English speaking trans* friends why I feel neutral pronouns wouldn’t work for me. I enjoy the mental gymnastics required to talk to my Catalan and Spanish friends about myself while being vigilant that I don’t fall into the deeply ingrained habits of using masculine forms of adjectives (and in Catalan, many adverbs as well) when referring to myself.I am struck by your mentioning partner dysphoria, it brings to mind a phenomenon I have noticed with my children, who are young adults. They have learned to refer to me as she, but of course, I am not their mother. So they end up in conversational tangles, such as “What does your dad do?” “My dad? She is …”Thanks for your insights and candour.

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